*You take out a contract on the kid who broke your childs 

favorite toy and made her cry!

*You only have enought time to shave one leg at a time.

*You hide in the bathroom to be alone...that  trick still 

doesn't work yet.

*Your kid throws up and you catch it...you're a pro

 at that!

*Someone elses kid throws up and you keep eating.

*You consider finger paint to be a controlled substance.

 

 

*You stop criticizing the way your mother raised you.

 

 

*You say atleast once a day that you "aren't cut out

for this job" but you know you wouldn't trade

 it for anything.